Presentations

I am the world's most godawful presenter. My last three weeks at group meetings have been nothing short of extremely awkward.

Two weeks ago, a lab colleague was presenting a paper on a genomics finding that indicates something called "reducible complexity" as opposed to irreducible complexity that the creationists tout as proof for an intelligent designer. As an ardent anti-IDist, I could not contain myself and started making snide comments. Clearly feeling a bit awkward by my jeering, my colleague said, "so, anyway, this key-and-lock theory," to which I replied "or 'Talking Serpent Theory'," which was not the smartest idea, considering the fact that 60% of my lab is Catholic.

Last week, I presented a review paper on genetic accomodation versus genetic acclimation, and barely thirty seconds into my paper, my boss interrupts me, and starts picking me apart. For thirty minutes, I try to respond to his barrage of questions and save face while he just shreds me into little pieces. I'm extremely lucky that I'm taking a journal seminar with Steve Kron, because otherwise I would've just fallen apart and cried right there.

This week, I decided to put myself at a strategic advantage by selecting a primary paper on molecular chaperones and their effects on mutation (underlying theory: genomically damaged proteins in some prokaryotes are still functional, which indicates that there is some sort of extra-genomic control of protein function--molecular chaperones are proteins that stablize protein folding in post-translational processes, although the direct mechanism is unknown). This time, the presentation of the paper itself went quite smoothly... until I decided to be all Steve Kron and tear the paper apart. I couldn't help myself! Their alternative hypothesis to chaperones directly affecting misshapen proteins was downright stupid: the chaperones probably affect other proteins that interact with functional stability. Uh... in other words, the protein that they claim is their molecular chaperone wasn't, in fact, a molecular chaperone. And this is without considering their measurement criterion of stability: growth. I mean, yes, growth is a phenotype, but there is so much more to growth than Zuo1!! Of course, I went on and on and I got weird looks. Let's face it. I suck at science presentations.

Here's something that pisses me off though. I claim that I hate molecular biology. I really do. I'm very open about my hatred for molecular biology. Unfortunately, it seems to be the only subject area I can actually read papers in! Steve Kron has definitely turned me into a molecular biologist, and what's bad about this is the fact that I'm a horrible molecular biologist! I don't know. I really don't know what to say about myself. So many inconsistencies. So many revelations of my own stupidity. I'm not saying this out of low self-esteem. I'm just being extremely matter-of-fact. I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. And, you know I am going to say this, but, neither do you. Of course, I'm not saying this because I know you. I say it because it's a somewhat poetic way to end a rant. But I believe its purpose has been lost. IAO XAOS!